I don’t even know what to say about this mashup of sisterhood and kitten horror except those people should not be alive and three cheers for women who share themselves with us and make us brighter.
I loved reading this story so much. The way you described your friend (I wonder what she’s up to now!) and the day on the beach felt like scenes from a novel!
But my heart really broke for those other little kitties. That’s so awful. I’m so glad you were able to save Sandy.
(Also, that vintage bottle of seltzer in one of the photos really transported me back in time!!)
The profound parts of you shine in this letter Abbey. The weightiness of witnessing horror, and the balance of rescuing the kitty….sitting in the place of “what I can do”. The beauty of friendship and the risks taken together as a response to strictness and harm. Beauty and terror are interlinked aren’t they? This piece sits in that pocket. A beautiful, terrible loving share. 💜🪻
Oh my goodness. Jess!!!! This was so beautiful and smart and kind and EVERYTHING. Thank you for seeing me and understanding me even if I’m unable to do so. Wow. Just… wow. Thank you.
This was so beautiful and sad at the same time. I loved reading it.
When I was in 3rd grade, a long long time ago, my best friend was a black girl who sat next to me in school. One lunch time, I asked my mom if I could invite her home to play. My mother looked at me and said, “We don’t invite those people into our homes”. I cried for hours. I still haven’t forgotten how I felt and I haven’t gotten over it to this day.
I’m sorry you had to turn away from Kenyale. I’m also furious.
So much to unpack here. I thought I was reading a sweet, pink-nostalgia colored missive about your personal soul journey, then SMACK! Monsters among us drowning kittens. It was traumatic just reading about it. Damn, girl. Before I got to that part, I was coming here to tell you that although I was always way more mainstream and boring than Feathers, I did carry a frog part (couldn't even tell you which organ) around in a baggy in my purse after dissection day in high school biology. I remember pulling it out in the cafeteria to freak people out. Can't even tell you why. Maybe I should write it out?....
This guts me... For one who was banned from watching, "Lassie" because I would be crying hysterically. Didn't care if Jimmy fell in the well, yet Lord have mercy, if anything happened to Lassie, I was inconsolable. Your heart is splashed all about the page, even if during times in your life, you needed to keep it safely tucked away, there it was/is. YOU SO totally are a girlfriend I would have adored having. I'm delighted to be getting to know you, Abbey. Grateful Glennon, brought us together as she did. That's a blessing that came out of something very disappointing and unsettling for me. As I read your take on it all I couldn't help but think, "we all could use an Abbey in our corners." Xo 💜🪶
There’s so much here that lingers. I totally agree that sometimes we aren'
t aware of the parts of ourselves that we’re been hiding until someone else coaxes them out.
Sandy broke me a little. Okay, a lot. This isn’t just a story about a kitten. It’s about who we dare to become when someone’s standing beside us. Beautifully told.
Also, your description of some of the guys you've dated made me think:
There Should Be a Word for That
boyfiend (n.) /ˈbɔɪ.fiːnd/
A man who arrives disguised as attention, affection, or possibility—but leaves you with whiplash, self-doubt, and maybe a poem you’ll never send.
Attractive. Chaotic. Sometimes a phase. Sometimes a pattern.
Origin: boyfriend + fiend — because he was never really yours, but somehow still managed to leave a dent.
You wanted love. He wanted worship, distraction, or just someone to fill the silence until the next tour date. He was emotionally unavailable, but still managed to consume your whole nervous system.
“Yeah, he was a boyfiend. Looked like healing. Spoke like longing. Felt like static.”
Related forms:
boyfiended (v.) — To mistake attention for intention. To be wrecked by someone whose favorite form of intimacy is inconsistency.
“I didn’t date him—I got boyfiended. There’s a difference.”
boyfiend loop (n.) — The cycle of craving chaos because it once showed up dressed as care.
“You’re not in love, babe. You’re in a boyfiend loop.”
We talk about bad timing, “it’s complicated,” or “he just needs to grow.” But not enough about how some men arrive like a song you want to dance to—until the lyrics land and you realize you’re bleeding on the floor.
If you’ve ever rationalized red flags into passion, or mistaken silence for depth, you already know boyfiend.
Robert!!! This is incredible. I love your word. Well played, sir. Also your take on this piece really touched me. I’m also sorry to have broken you with Sandy. It’s such a hard memory. But also a beautiful one. Bittersweet for sure. Thank you so much. This means a lot❤️
First, I love that you saved a kitten - I knew we were kindred spirits. It takes a special kind of bravery to put yourself between a tormentor and the tormented. It also takes a special kind of bravery to continue to lay down vulnerable, sometimes hilarious, sometimes sad, always real words. Hugs to you.
Oh man. Thank you, Molly!! I really feel that. All of it. Thank you. You’re always so kind and I really do feel your words. Kindred spirits for damn sure ❤️
That's was very good writing. I lived it. I was hanging on every word, sentence, and punctuation. You got every emotion going. Damn, that just got me. You are a treasure trove of stories and ways to write. Thank you so much for being, you.🫶
Oh gosh, I have a similar story about interracial dating that I'm not quite ready to share in a public comment quite yet but OOF will that sure leave a mark, that's for sure.
Oh man, yeah it’s a tough topic to put out there. This was a small southern town and the man who raised me was (is still, I suppose… somewhere) very small minded. And a complete asshole. And I wish I could have helped Sandy’s brothers and sisters. It’s hard to think about sometimes. I’ll never forget it though
I really loved the intimacy of this ,it sparked some memories for me .The cruising with boys and making out till sunrise in their cigarette Camaro .I may even remember something very similar
I have a special place for kitties and them for me that got me leaking .
Awww. This is so sweet. Thank you, Teddi. This time of my life, I remember so vividly. And it’s a wonder I haven’t written about it more. I’m sure Feathers is happy somewhere. I hope she is.❤️
I mean that was deep I was traveling with you I was thinking about your friend and the dissected heart and of course chasing the cats and saving them, only horrible people would throw cats into the surf like that this is a bit presumptuous but I feel like I know exactly who you are and I'm sure you're unknowable at the same time
I don’t even know what to say about this mashup of sisterhood and kitten horror except those people should not be alive and three cheers for women who share themselves with us and make us brighter.
Also yes. Three cheers for the good women. Like you❤️
Sisterhood and Kitten Horror. I know it’s not funny (it’s not funny, Abbey) but that’s (sorry) just a really good band name.
I loved reading this story so much. The way you described your friend (I wonder what she’s up to now!) and the day on the beach felt like scenes from a novel!
But my heart really broke for those other little kitties. That’s so awful. I’m so glad you were able to save Sandy.
(Also, that vintage bottle of seltzer in one of the photos really transported me back in time!!)
Awww Stephanie I adore you. You’re detail oriented as I am and I love that. I think about those kitties too. That moment lives with me forever.
❤️ ❤️ ❤️
Lovely. Thanks for sharing.
Thanks, Craig!❤️
Can we still banter once in a while?
You bet your sweet ass we can
The profound parts of you shine in this letter Abbey. The weightiness of witnessing horror, and the balance of rescuing the kitty….sitting in the place of “what I can do”. The beauty of friendship and the risks taken together as a response to strictness and harm. Beauty and terror are interlinked aren’t they? This piece sits in that pocket. A beautiful, terrible loving share. 💜🪻
Oh my goodness. Jess!!!! This was so beautiful and smart and kind and EVERYTHING. Thank you for seeing me and understanding me even if I’m unable to do so. Wow. Just… wow. Thank you.
I’m so glad you feel so seen by my witnessing Abbey!
This was so beautiful and sad at the same time. I loved reading it.
When I was in 3rd grade, a long long time ago, my best friend was a black girl who sat next to me in school. One lunch time, I asked my mom if I could invite her home to play. My mother looked at me and said, “We don’t invite those people into our homes”. I cried for hours. I still haven’t forgotten how I felt and I haven’t gotten over it to this day.
I’m sorry you had to turn away from Kenyale. I’m also furious.
Oh, this made me cry. Thank you for sharing that with me. It’s messed up. Love to you❤️
Love to you, too.
So much to unpack here. I thought I was reading a sweet, pink-nostalgia colored missive about your personal soul journey, then SMACK! Monsters among us drowning kittens. It was traumatic just reading about it. Damn, girl. Before I got to that part, I was coming here to tell you that although I was always way more mainstream and boring than Feathers, I did carry a frog part (couldn't even tell you which organ) around in a baggy in my purse after dissection day in high school biology. I remember pulling it out in the cafeteria to freak people out. Can't even tell you why. Maybe I should write it out?....
Leslie!!!! Oh this delights me so. The urge to carry a tiny amphibian organ in your pocket is something so weirdly wonderful. Please write about that.
Also, thank you. And I’m sorry for the trauma. It hurts; I know❤️
This guts me... For one who was banned from watching, "Lassie" because I would be crying hysterically. Didn't care if Jimmy fell in the well, yet Lord have mercy, if anything happened to Lassie, I was inconsolable. Your heart is splashed all about the page, even if during times in your life, you needed to keep it safely tucked away, there it was/is. YOU SO totally are a girlfriend I would have adored having. I'm delighted to be getting to know you, Abbey. Grateful Glennon, brought us together as she did. That's a blessing that came out of something very disappointing and unsettling for me. As I read your take on it all I couldn't help but think, "we all could use an Abbey in our corners." Xo 💜🪶
Joanie!!!! My heart is holding your heart right now. This was such a beautiful offering. And I love it. Thank goodness for you. Loving you❤️
There’s so much here that lingers. I totally agree that sometimes we aren'
t aware of the parts of ourselves that we’re been hiding until someone else coaxes them out.
Sandy broke me a little. Okay, a lot. This isn’t just a story about a kitten. It’s about who we dare to become when someone’s standing beside us. Beautifully told.
Also, your description of some of the guys you've dated made me think:
There Should Be a Word for That
boyfiend (n.) /ˈbɔɪ.fiːnd/
A man who arrives disguised as attention, affection, or possibility—but leaves you with whiplash, self-doubt, and maybe a poem you’ll never send.
Attractive. Chaotic. Sometimes a phase. Sometimes a pattern.
Origin: boyfriend + fiend — because he was never really yours, but somehow still managed to leave a dent.
You wanted love. He wanted worship, distraction, or just someone to fill the silence until the next tour date. He was emotionally unavailable, but still managed to consume your whole nervous system.
“Yeah, he was a boyfiend. Looked like healing. Spoke like longing. Felt like static.”
Related forms:
boyfiended (v.) — To mistake attention for intention. To be wrecked by someone whose favorite form of intimacy is inconsistency.
“I didn’t date him—I got boyfiended. There’s a difference.”
boyfiend loop (n.) — The cycle of craving chaos because it once showed up dressed as care.
“You’re not in love, babe. You’re in a boyfiend loop.”
We talk about bad timing, “it’s complicated,” or “he just needs to grow.” But not enough about how some men arrive like a song you want to dance to—until the lyrics land and you realize you’re bleeding on the floor.
If you’ve ever rationalized red flags into passion, or mistaken silence for depth, you already know boyfiend.
Robert!!! This is incredible. I love your word. Well played, sir. Also your take on this piece really touched me. I’m also sorry to have broken you with Sandy. It’s such a hard memory. But also a beautiful one. Bittersweet for sure. Thank you so much. This means a lot❤️
First, I love that you saved a kitten - I knew we were kindred spirits. It takes a special kind of bravery to put yourself between a tormentor and the tormented. It also takes a special kind of bravery to continue to lay down vulnerable, sometimes hilarious, sometimes sad, always real words. Hugs to you.
Oh man. Thank you, Molly!! I really feel that. All of it. Thank you. You’re always so kind and I really do feel your words. Kindred spirits for damn sure ❤️
That's was very good writing. I lived it. I was hanging on every word, sentence, and punctuation. You got every emotion going. Damn, that just got me. You are a treasure trove of stories and ways to write. Thank you so much for being, you.🫶
Mark!! This is so kind. What a glorious compliment. Thank you❤️
Oh gosh, I have a similar story about interracial dating that I'm not quite ready to share in a public comment quite yet but OOF will that sure leave a mark, that's for sure.
I'm so glad you were able to help Sandy <3.
Oh man, yeah it’s a tough topic to put out there. This was a small southern town and the man who raised me was (is still, I suppose… somewhere) very small minded. And a complete asshole. And I wish I could have helped Sandy’s brothers and sisters. It’s hard to think about sometimes. I’ll never forget it though
I really loved the intimacy of this ,it sparked some memories for me .The cruising with boys and making out till sunrise in their cigarette Camaro .I may even remember something very similar
I have a special place for kitties and them for me that got me leaking .
Please try and find Feathers Thank You
Awww. This is so sweet. Thank you, Teddi. This time of my life, I remember so vividly. And it’s a wonder I haven’t written about it more. I’m sure Feathers is happy somewhere. I hope she is.❤️
Love this. And I will be haunted by those drowning kittens for the rest of my
days.
Oh Lindsey I know. I’m sorry. It haunts me too.
I truly hope a similar fate finds those people. Karma.
I know. Same. I still see them in my mind. Just sprawled out on their chairs…
Thank you for grabbing Sandy though. ❤️
Oh man that brought some tears. Yeah... I did what I could do
That’s all you can do.
I mean that was deep I was traveling with you I was thinking about your friend and the dissected heart and of course chasing the cats and saving them, only horrible people would throw cats into the surf like that this is a bit presumptuous but I feel like I know exactly who you are and I'm sure you're unknowable at the same time
Rob, that’s a beautiful thing to say and I take it as a very big compliment. Truly, thank you. This means so much
Wow that was fantastic I'm flattered that you even communicate with me
Rob!! Of course I communicate with you. You’re lovely. And thank you so much .
Thank you!!!